Saturday, 20 December 2014

Christmas with Piers Gaveston

Somewhere I England, nearly Christmas, 1308, the new Earl Of Cornwall is preparing his Christmas list.

Ah, Christmas as an Earl is sure to be a tricky one.  I mean, what does one give the other barons for Christmas?  I doubt they will ever give me a present, but seeing their faces as I sit beside my dear Edward as they bend their knees to us, well, it’s unbeatable:) 

 Hmmmm, let me think.  The Earl of Lincoln – Burstbelly – now what would he like, apart from all the food he could gorge in one sitting?  Got it – a diet book!  That will be soooo good for his health.  Now for Guy of Warwick – the Black Hound – easy really.  A nice new bone to chew on, and perhaps a ball for his to chase after.  Edward’s cousin, Thomas of Lancaster – the Churl – well, Edward and I know what he’d like – the throne.  That’s out of the question of course.  I think a book on etiquette and a ‘Tales of King Arthur’ book would be ideal.  And for our dear, faithful friend Roger Mortimer – a friendship bracelet. 

Edward is going to be very difficult to get a present for.  I mean, he has everything he wants – me.  So he tells me.  I’m thinking along the line of personalised rowing oars.  I know how much he loves rowing, and it does help to build up those bulging biceps.  Plus a crate of ale from The Thatchers pub.  I do hope he doesn’t get me anything too extravagant – I mean, the Earldom and the fabulous castle that goes with it is more than enough – although a few diamonds are always welcome – after all, diamonds are an Earl’s best friend.
I suppose I ought to get something for the child bride, Isabella.  Some nice colouring in manuscripts, perhaps?  And a book.  Yes, I’ve heard of a new title just out – ‘He’s Just Not That Into You’.  It’ll be a big help to her – especially as she’s heading for her teenage years – which reminds me – some spot lotion would also be ideal.

I'm so looking forward to Christmas this year!   Merry Christmas to one and all!


Kasia Ogrodnik said...

Merry Christmas, dear Anerje! Piers is so witty and charming, as always! I wish him all the best in the new year, many brilliant posts by his lovely champion and... let him have his diamonds :-)

Kathryn Warner said...

Haha, this is great! :-) Merry Christmas, Anerje and Piers!

Anerje said...

Piers appreciates your comments;). He likes to put in a Christmas appearance.

A very merry Christmas to you and looking forward to all your bloggs in 2015!

Gabriele C. said...

Lol, he's a charming rascal indeed. Merry Christmas to Anerje and Piers.

(It would be easier to find a present for Hugh: more lands.)

Anerje said...

Ah, Gabriele, lands don't sparkle like diamonds:) That's Piers for you!